Curse of Darkness: My Adventure
by Evilmini86
Summary: When I picked up the controller and became Hector, this is what went on... in a way... somewhere in my mind. I swear. SPOILLERSS!
1. Uno y Dos

Castlevania: Curse of Darkness: My Adventure

Chapter I: Uno y Dos

-The air is thick and foggy. A tall and menacing castle stands… menacingly before our 'hero.' Isaac appears in front of the door of the abandoned castle. His orange hair and interesting attire are _so_ not the 15th century.

Isaac: Muahahahahaha!

Hector: Isaac!

Isaac: MUAHAHAHAA!

Hector: Isaac!

Isaac: What? Oh, sorry, I was remembering something funny from earlier. What was I saying? Ah yes, I killed your woman and now you are weak and AHAHAAHAAA!

Hector: The rivers will run red with your blood Isaac! You shall rue the day!

Isaac: Oh I will, will I?

Hector: RUUUUUUUE!

Isaac: Interesting, seeing as you have given up all your powers in betraying DRACULA™! Why don't you come back when you have a chance, eh?

Hector: I could kill you now!

Isaac: Oh honestly! Don't you see this huge demon beast next to me! You really think that is a good idea Hector. Oh how I pity thee… mmmm…

Hector: What is that demon?

Isaac: Oh _now_ you ask? I swear it's like pulling teeth with you, Hector. You don't notice my new innocent devil, you don't notice I got a new haircut or I dyed my hair a new shade of—

Hector: ISSAC!

Isaac: Don't raise your voice at me! It's an innocent devil, you are a devil forge master like me, we are the only two who posses such power. Now, I was supposed to exit a long time ago so … MUAHAHAHAAHHHA! HAHAHAHAA!

-Issac continues to laugh as he walks down the hall with his innocent devil at his side. Hector stands below the steps filled with anger as a subtitle appears with the words Abandoned Castle. Hector ignores the message as it fades out and continues up the steps.

Hector: Where did all of this music come from? Is that a zombie? What in God's name is going on here?

-With shitty short sword in hand, he charges forward and knocks the shit out some skeletons and stuff finding Bronze. Lots and lots of Bronze. And then some more bronze. After running around for a while and killing stuff, Hector runs into a treasure chest. Made of bronze perhaps?

Hector: Well, that is random and convenient. Lemme see. (whack!) Um, okay. (whack) Well, this is rather pointless.

-10 minutes later

Hector: Who does this! Honestly, I'm leaving.

-Eventually, he runs into a crazy green door that holds inside it a crazy green fairy.

Hector: Um, hi. My name is Sir Hector of… well, I'm Hector. And you are?

ID:….

Hector: Ah. So I must name you.

ID:…

Hector: Alright. Can you stop wiggling? I can't think of a name.

ID:…feee!

Hector: Okay… I see. You like that, eh? Well, your name can be Fee-Wiggle.

Fee-Wiggle: oooo!

Hector: Do you speak English?

Fee-Wiggle: Eeeheee!

Hector: Right…. So what do you do?

(poof!)

Hector: Did the number 20 just pop out of my head? That's what you do? You make numbers pop out of my head? Well, I'm sure _that_ will come in handy. Come, Fee-Wiggle!

Fee-Wiggle: Weeee!

-So the pair continue.

Hector: My god! These treasure chests! Why are they here!

Fee-Wiggle: Fweee! (poof)

Hector: Oh. Well, thank you I guess.

-Well, Hector collects lots of materials and fashions himself a cheap knock off of a rapier made of aluminum foil.

Hector: I'll call it a Foil!

-Nice one. So any way, they run into this HUGE thing… it's a cursed suit of armor gone crazy.

Hector: I'll call it Crazy Armor.

-After the battle is won… a glowing circle of blue begins to emanate from the ground. Hectors stands in it and is revived completely.

Hector: That worked better than your number 20's….

-And on they travel to the Baljhet Mountains by way of crazy gondola ride.

Hector: My god this music is annoying. I better get something good out of this place.

-And indeed he did, in another green room there was another innocent devil for him to forge. the last one with a cinema too!

Hector: My name is Hector and this is Fee-Wiggle— Where is Fee-Wiggle! My god, you killed it you massive demon creature!

ID: Que?

Hector: What? Um… I don't speak Spanish.

ID: No halba ingles.

Hector: This is great. Okay, um… hmmm… Donde esta?

ID: (confused) Aqui….

Hector: Okay… umm… 'Tu' come with-a me. Okay?

ID: Come? Que quieres desayunar?

Hector: Whoa… is that your name or something? Desayuno? Okay, Desayuno! Let's go!

Desayuno???

-After 30 minutes with a Spanish to English dictionary.

Hector: So what you are saying is that I just named you 'Breakfast'?

Desayuno: Si.

Hector: Perdoname.

Desayuno: Is okay.

Hector: Desayuno, vamos!


	2. Hello Lady

Castlevania: Curse of Darkness: My Adventure

Chapter Two: Hello Lady…

Note: This is really based on the way I played my game and the reactions to everything between my friend and I. My first battle type was named Desayuno, cause he looks like a Mexican Wrestler and I love that word. Anywho, enjoy…. BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND… My Adventure…

Hector: 'And so we continue to embark on our adventure, and I am not alone. Not with Fee-Wiggle and Desayuno by my side.' he says aloud as he writes in his journal Now where is Fee-Wiggle? Desayuno, I'm asking you a question.

Desayuno: No se.

Hector: Damn. FEE-WIGGLEEEE!

-Desayuno begins to sparkle and disappear into a white light as Fee-Wiggle, well, does the opposite.

Hector: Okay? So I can only have one of you out at a time? How convenient for THE POWERS THAT BE! Okay, no offense but…. DESAYUNOOOO!

-KAPPPOOOF!11

Desayuno: RAAAAAAWWRR!

Hector: Oh shit! You sound mad and you are magnificently huge. Let us go. I mean: VAMOS!

-The two run off through the Baljheet Mountains. The music goes on forever and it gets stuck in Hector's head until he curses. One after another of those annoying skeletons show up. HIT-HIT-CRUSH. Desayuno jumps and comes crashing down on them every time. After proceeding to do a few handy acrobatic jumps, Hector lands in front of an odd looking zombie. The green and gold subtitle told him what it was but again, he listens not.

Hector: What is this?

Desayuno: aura blast in wrong direction

Hector: Thank you. Um, What are you and why aren't you moving?

Zombie Lv. 4: uuuhhhhhggghhh… Seizure shake

Hector: Oh god! Are you okay?

Desayuno: No tocas!

Hector: That doesn't look too good; you should get that checked out.

Zombie Lv. 4: VOMIT!

Hector: Oh shiT! Nasty! That got on my shoe! Oh god it burns!

Desayuno: jumps on the zombie, killing it… runs to Hector and rubs his foot "Sana sana colita de rana…"

Hector: What? How is that supposed to help? How about you don't talk and just be my muscle?

Desayuno¿Por que?

Hector: Porque no me gusta…um… looks through dictionary

Desayuno: Me?

Hector: No, I like you fine. I just have a mission and see how we are taking forever? No me gusta… el waste-o de time-o.

Desayuno: Desperdiciar hora.

Hector: Sure.

-And so they continue, fighting Fenirs and a Lizardman and a few other things. More Bronze, some aluminum and now… JET BLACK! They happen on a woman. Hector freaks.

Hector: OMG! I thought you were dead baby I love you!

Julia: Um, I have no idea who you are, but I'm a witch named Julia. You aren't a DEVILFORGEMASTER, are you?

Hector: Only on weekdays. So you aren't my dead lover?

Julia: No. And you aren't evil like my bro— I mean that evil guy Isaac?

Hector: ISAAC!

Julia?

Hector: Right. You sure you're not my lovely—

Julia: Yeah.

Hector: ROSELIEIEHGSDY!

Julia: Um, I have a shop here in the middle of nowhere where there are no people to be found and therefore I am totally bankrupt (until now) that you can visit and collect things. And you can bring me devil shards and I can make them into ID's for you.

Hector: Interesting plot twist, I bet there will be more later. Hmm, you know, it's interesting that you happen to be a witch, but even more intriguing that you just HAPPEN to know how to revive Innocent Devils' being as there are only two people in the world who can use them and you don't know me and that would only leave Isaac, but I will turn a blind eye to that obvious little tid-bit and continue on my journey to find ISAAC and kill him.

Julia: Yes… you do that… MUAHAHAHAHA! HAHAAH!

Hector: Interesting, it seems as though I know someone that laughs incessantly just like you do.

Julia: No you don't.

Hector: Okay, farewell.

-And so the two continue their journey. All of a sudden as Hector turns a corner he gets shot with a flaming arrow and a 5 pops out of his head.

Hector: Ouch! Desayuno! AURA BLAST HIS ASS!

ARAGGAGAAAH!

Hector: Charge!

-They run and fight and run and fight. They find shitty metals and shiny pink hearts that Desayuno likes to call Pan de dulce rosa. And they end up on a hill with a bunch of red skeletons.

Hector: Ha! Wha! Ya!

Desayuno: ARRRGGG! RAWR!

Hector: Hoo! Ha! Heeerrr!

Desayuno: ARRRGGG! RAWR!

Hector: Why is this not working?

Desayuno: ARRRGGG! RAWR!

-10 minutes later

Hector: Ha! Wha! Ya!

Desayuno: ARRRGGG! RAWR!

Hector: Hoo! Ha! Heeerrr!

Desayuno: ARRRGGG! RAWR!

Hector: Why is this not working…still?

Desayuno: ARRRGGG! RAWR!

Hector: Fuck it…

-So they turn back and end up, after a lot of walking and getting lost on the map, in a Dragon's den.

Hector: OMFG! Are you serious? If I'm following Isaac and he went through here, how'd he leave all this crap behind without dying somewhere?

Desayuno: ARRAGG! charges

Hector: No! Wait we need a plan first!

Wyvern: BAM! Tail smack!

Desayuno: AAAAAAAAAH!

Hector: Yeah, good idea, genius.

-They fight and fight. Desayuno 'dies' and Hector freaks out thinking that he's really dead. Fee-Wiggle soon parishes as well, which doesn't affect him nearly as bad. He defeats the dragon on a fluke, nearly dead and very badly burnt. The blue shiny thing bursts from the ground once more and he takes full advantage of the spoils. He then enters the Garibaldi Temple filled with sorrow and woe.

Hector: Oh god! He's dead! DESAYUNO!

-A bunch of skeletons come after him; he crushes them all with vengeful might. Heart crystals pop out as he fights.

Hector: I shall collect these for DESAYUNO; he loved them sooo much!

poof

Desayuno: Hola! Como estas!

Hector: Wtf.

Desayuno: Pan de dulce rosa.

Hector: Okay, I get it.

-The continue again, but this time run into an odd looking futuristic circus entertainer.

St. Germaine: Why hello, I'm St. Germaine!

Hector: …….

ST. Germaine: So I here you are the DEVILFORGEMASTER!

Hector: Where is everyone getting that from?

St. Germaine: Yessss… I'm from the future.

Hector: I'll fight you.

St. Germaine: Actually you will, near the end of the game. Bet you didn't know that. But I did, cause I'm from the future.

Hector: Good for you.

-And so they travel on. After much more fighting and much more collecting of metals and memories and tools… Hector builds a club, some axes, and a huge ass sword he can't wield very well. Finally, he settles with a lance and decides that spear type weapons are better for him.

Hector: Spear type weapons are better for me.

-The fight and fight and steal some good old Fuji Spirit from a 'Lesser Demon.' Then they come to a huge room obviously set aside for a boss fight. Red walls, red curtains, red carpets… very red. And inside stood Trevor Belmont.

Trevor: ARE YOU THE DEVILFORGEMASTER!

Hector: Holy crap… you seem mad… well, you see…

Trevor: ARE YOU THE DEVILFORGEMASTER!

Hector: Are you going to fight with me anyway?

Trevor: Yes.

Hector: Fine. Then yes, I am. But I am not evil like Isaac.

Trevor: YOU KNOW ISAAC! EVIL BLASTPHEMERRR!

Hector: Hey!

-And so they fight. Trevor kicks Hectors ass like a million times over, so he goes back in time and levels up and relives the whole incident. This time, he comes back stronger, Desayuno had evolved into a Speed-Mail and was able to cast down swords from heaven.

flashback-ish

Hector: Wow! DESAYUNO, what's happening to you! You are all shiny and fetus like in that ball of florescent goo! You evolved!

Desayuno: Yo desarrollo!

Hector: Wow, you are a hot piece of metal fury. That sword and everything, wow, you are gonna kick some crazy ass!

back to the Trevor thing

-The fight was long a grueling and was nearly another fluke. Desayuno held his own and for some reason kicked more ass than Hector did, he was just a little slow. Trevor's little 'Holy Light' special was a little too self-righteous for them so afterwards, they just left, even though they really didn't win, the fight just sort of ended. C'est la vie.

-And on to the Mortiva Aquaduct they traveled…


End file.
